Victim Language

I am not a victim.

I made that choice long ago.

Then why, oh why... do I say things like:

I couldn't do that because my kids were little

I can't do that because I didn't have enough money

I couldn't / can't do it because.... well, you get the picture...


You could call it excuses..... but they are real reasons

You could call it blame..... but it isn't really..... I don't FEEL blame.... it's just true...


But in honesty... it's VICTIM language

It sounds like I truly couldn't do what I wanted.  It sounds like I was prevented from doing what I wanted.

But truly I COULD

and I DID and I continue to do what I want :-)

I made a choice to be with my kids instead of doing other things.

I make/made choices as to how to spend my money

I make choices... so I am not a victim

That is important - say it again...

I make choices, therefore I am NOT a victim.


I think for the most part we do not think about the power of our words... especially the words we use inside our own heads.

And those are the very words that inspire us or hold us back.

The very words that lift us up or beat us down..... we are responsible for those words.

Just as we need to watch our tongues around other people and choose our words wisely.... I think we need to be careful how we talk to ourselves.  Our words define us..... we need to be careful not to box ourselves into a definition that isn't what we would CHOOSE :-)