Monday, December 29, 2014

Day 16.... Sick

 A little germ has taken hold

and my own worry and Christmas junk food excess has allowed it.

I mean - I know people with good attitudes do get sick - but I also know that, for me, I get more sick... feel bad longer.. when I worry or get upset about it.

Just a head cold - but a reminder!

So I've spent the last few days - alternating between napping... and chafing to get things done.  Being able to stay home is encouraging me to make lists....  [and even do some of the things on the lists!]

My craft storage... what a mess!  All the traveling in October & November... choosing portable projects and supplies.... has left me with assorted mixed bags of yarn and unfinished projects...  Time to get that all straightened out again and set up January's work!

And the fabric!  Again with the traveling... not really time for machine piecing or quilting.. so things are stacking up.. projects I want to do.. projects I need to finish...  plus my own personal habit of - end of month (NO new projects, only work on things already started)

But I am tired.  So a little putzing and sorting is good - but too much leaves me overwhelmed... so I am grateful for feeling well enough to do just a little.

I am grateful to be able to stay home at all (thanks to friends at church who filled in for me today!)

A little online banking and reconciling... (end of year coming up fast!)... and more reading...

And pretty enough weather to stroll a bit outside....

Yep.... sick....

but a good day!

Friday, December 26, 2014

Day 14....

Family gatherings are often

problematic.

Stress is high,

tempers flare,
and when you can't be honest with yourself

you invariably hurt others.

Such a burst happened at our holiday gathering

and was enough to shut it down

Polite murmurings and goodbyes....

the party was over.

It happens.

But through it all, I was proud of my children.

Each of them

made decisions to nurture and protect their own family unit
and their personal family holiday.

I have made many mistakes as a parent.... but today I saw good fruit.

My kids can take care of their own home, hearth and spirit.

And in the midst of the emotional turmoil, this brought me JOY

Thursday, December 25, 2014

Day 12 - Christmas Day

Christmas Day..... in a changing life

looks like most other days

except for a whirlwind of cooking and preparation for the afternoon ahead.

I spend the time in gratitude

for a warm home and people who love me.
for memories of Christmas past - and fond thoughts for my children and their children this special morning

And a hope that I do not let my life run away with me

That I can

each day

enjoy the little things that make life special

That I can do a little

each day

to prepare a little 'specialness' for tomorrow

That I can be eternally grateful

and joyful

for the opportunity to be present in the world.

I have JOY now

and am ready for MORE!

Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Christmas Gifter vs Scrooge

One of my biggest gripes about Christmas is all this giving......

This ONE time of the year when one is expected to give, give, give....

Not that I mind giving.. [though I look like Scrooge on Christmas Day!]

I am a gifter.

All year long.

I love to give things to people and make them smile.

I do NOT like to be told when to give and what to give.  I do NOT like the cultural judgment when I choose not to.

And somehow we have created a time where we have to give to everyone.  And we are judged by what that is.

I DO LIKE the annual reminder to think about those who serve us....  the nail tech, the hairdresser, the UPS person...

But how many times has MY UPS gift gone to a sub?

And how many boxes of candy does ONE nail tech need in December?

And I hold my stance.

I give all year...  I will prepare cards for my favorite service people and give them out in January or February (Valentines is good, don't you think?)

Even Christmas cards are really annual greetings - who says they have to come at Christmas? 

I may show up at your holiday party with just myself... or I may not come at all - as I simplify my life.

Why must this be a time of excess?  Doesn't that miss the point?

Where is the JOY in excess?

I have specific things I give my family on THE day.
Every year. 

I usually choose a specific item as my random giveaway as I travel through the season..  candy canes, homemade ornaments... this year I learned to make jelly so I have a million little jars of treasure that I will be giving away for a while...

It simplifies my holiday season.

And I give homemade and sale bought things all year long. 

So I think I am a gifter - just not a Christmas gifter....

At Christmas, I am more like Scrooge.




Wed. Jan. 1 – 3 Mega Miles!
(OR walk for 45 mins. / OR count 6,000 steps)
Thurs. Jan. 2 – Walk It Off in 30 Days (Burn 30 segment)
(OR walk for 30 mins. / OR count 4,000 steps)
Fri. Jan. 3 – Walk It Off in 30 Days (Firm 30 segment)
(OR strength train Lower Body)
Sat. Jan. 4 – Belly Blasting Walk
+ Healthy Abs & Back segments
(OR walk 30 mins. OR count 4,000 steps)
(ADD Core exercise)
Sun. Jan. 5 – Walk after Sunday Dinner with family or friends … don’t count minutes, miles or steps …. Just walk, talk, enjoy your loved ones! Ok … let’s “count” only our blessings!
- See more at: http://www.walkathome.com/sansone/walk-gym-2014-a-year-of-walking/#sthash.rGwTt7sa.dpuf

Tuesday, December 23, 2014

Day 8

Gray, cold, wet.....

No one home but me

Why, oh WHY can't I stay home and putz... getting ready for the next few hectic days?

But I can't

I promised to work
I need to go to the store for the LAST last time before Christmas.

poo

I left late - and muddled through

the store was crowded..
work took longer than I expected
and I had another errand to do before I could go home

But there were smiles along the way - and hugs - and the expectation of being able to stay home for the next few days and get things together.

One of the factors in my life that I need to work on is the way I structure my life on days I go into town.  I have an hour commute each way... and, somehow.. on those days I go.. for however long... the day is shot.  I am absolutely WHUPPED when I get home.

So I will work on strategies this year to minimize the anxiety of days away.

But for today..  I will be grateful for the friends and family I encountered today

for the chance to brighten their day and have them brighten mine

and head home to figure out how to muddle through the next few days.

How's your Christmas Day prep coming along?

Boundaries

        Boundaries...  I struggle so with boundaries!  How much or little to do with or for others!
I have spent my life saying 'yes, of course I can help'!       

And that is good.

Except when I no longer even know what my own plans are

Except when people call me first before they even try to do it themselves

Except when I can't please everyone and I lose my peace.


I found that I became a person who continually disrupted my own life in order to fix others' problems.

And most times, I don't mind, really.

BUT then your life goes smoothly and mine doesn't....  and you aren't worrying about that.   And, that is okay too.   I probably shouldn't have spent so much time worrying about YOUR problems.


But when it becomes a pattern....  twenty years later....  I have trouble putting my plans over yours.

And, even if you don't validate me... I need to be able to validate myself.

My plans are my plans.  And they are valid.  They are not - should not - be subject to your judgment.  My need to have my life in some kind of order and my method of thinking things through and determining how to help is just as important as the current need you want filled.  And "I" need to be the one to recognize this.

And when it becomes a pattern....  twenty years later....  sometimes I have hampered you.

I can't always rescue you.  And I should not be expected to.   I am lecturing MYSELF more than you... because I am MOM, WIFE, ASSISTANT, VOLUNTEER...  all things to all people.  I have the need inside myself for everyone around me to be happy - and, somehow, I feel responsibility for this.

As a person with a gift of service, I have served too much.  Service is comfortable to me.  NOT serving feels wrong.

But how often has MY service hampered YOUR growth?
MY inability to say NO
MY worrying about you being upset or angry or inconvenienced


I want to be an unselfish person.

And I am.

But it doesn't feel that way when I say NO.

Even saying, please call someone else FIRST feels selfish.  But it isn't.   It is truth.

I want to help.  I want to make sure you have what you need.

But I need to be clear that this is inconvenient at this time.  That it will cause a problem for me.  That if you can find someone else, it would truly help me.

AND in the interest of truth

IF it is ME and not just my service that you want or need,  you need to tell me.

Because if you don't tell me this, I won't know.

Without the words, we both blunder in the dark and do not have truth or peace.







Monday, December 22, 2014

Day 7 / 365

Today I write about determination.

The Sunday before Christmas...  first the service....

   then hurry to get people out so decorating can happen
                   and the children can practice singing...

I leave quickly so they can get to it... and I can go about my own grocery shopping..  trying to get home to spend a little time with my family.

Myself?   I am tired too.  The events of the last 2 days have been exhausting....  personal victories... looking back, there are things I could have done better.  But getting through the social events without a shutdown OR a meltdown is huge!

The result is exhaustion today.  And the sugar / salt "food' readily available isn't helping me or anyone else!  So I am determined...

to come home

and eat a piece of fruit...

or cut veggies

or something that will help me feel better.

And the mood at home is down,

depressed.

Do you ever walk in the door at home... that place where you have spent the whole day longing to be..  and the atmosphere of discontent smacks you in the face?

Jeez...

TRUTH:  I am responsible for my own feelings and actions.

And in this 60th year of my life, I accept that responsibility.  And I will find JOY!

So..... with my college boy heading back to school tomorrow... and my spouse struggling in his own way with the holiday happenings....  I made my son's favorite chex mix snacks for him to take back with him.

Making this for him brought me JOY!

I still find myself paralyzed with the cards and chores - but that is probably because I am still kind of tired.   I have done a good job of preparing.. and bought enough food to be able to pitch in where needed with no extra hassle on my part.  I am good.  I am ready. 

Tomorrow is another day with its own challenges and tonight - with the making of the first batch of chex mix under my belt - I will be happy.




Sunday, December 21, 2014

Day 6/365

Waking to the sounds of my 4 & 5 year old grandgirls whispering in the dark morning hours... cousin pillow talk

What a sense of.... 'All's Right with the World'!

I smiled even as I fumbled out of bed to find coffee and the energy to keep up with them today :-)  which truly isn't hard because the TRUTH is that their sleepovers with me are as much about their time with each other as it is time with me.

But what a joy-filled... AND anxiety-filled day!

First off, I want to say that I have the bestest, kindest family ever.  I have an indulgent husband and a great life.

And I hesitate to be open about my fears and worries because I do not want any of my nearest and dearest - family and/or friends - to feel in any way responsible for MY struggles in the past few years.

But I hope - with my honesty - that my children can perhaps spot their own problems before they begin in earnest....  or perhaps they will have compassion and understanding when they recognize similar behaviors in others...  or perhaps they will read a story of healing and know that they are indeed in charge of their lives and feelings.

It is no one's FAULT.... it is a part of me.  AND, thus is up to me to HEAL because I do not wish to be paralyzed so completely

ever again. 

Back to my day, I had the grands overnight and had invited my children to come to my little town Christmas celebration.   And I had offered to read a story to the children at the party.

And this after the party last night. 

I did plan this.  I planned the most LOW STRESS 9for me) events imaginable to step back out and navigate.  BUT

my day was overshadowed by a stomachache and headache that nagged me.... not enough to debilitate - but close!

I was unsure of how many people I would be feeding - though I was close - AND prepared enough.  The dish I planned to prepare - well, I forgot to buy an ingredient so had to pull a switch.  Fortunately, a dish with pasta, sauce and cheese is easy to re-frame!  And I baked bread - which made me feel accomplished...   and kept me busy...

I worried about what to read at the celebration... and how many people would be there... and... and....  I practiced with the girls and the book I had chosen was too long.... BUT I had checked out others so it was all good...  But it didn't FEEL good!  I had plans to "accidentally" leave the book behind... 'forget' my glasses...  in case I didn't feel up to doing it..

Can you see?  I had back-up plans all along....   It is easy to see when I write it down - but can you see how busy my worrying little brain was?

The headache and stomachache didn't help..... but I did have the girls to play with and enjoy (the ULTIMATE in JOY) .... and I did not shut down.

and I am here.... the day after... writing about the experience... pain free :-)

So I am PROUD of me.  And this brings me JOY.

I not only chose to step back into the world.... I chose HOW. 

I invited the family down for a town celebration.... an informal meal and an evening of small town activity.  Easy...
And I participated in the public event doing something I am really good at and love doing.

AND got to be part of some JOY and excitement of others.





Day 5/365

A quiet day to begin....

cooking breakfast for my guys....

doing a bit of paperwork....

and some major victories this evening...

This is my year for finding JOY
    but it's hard sometimes when life is full of minefields.
                and at 59, I have learned that while JOY is around every corner... almost everything in life has a reminder of a minefield as well.
    mixed blessings always.

Some know - most don't - but much of my determination this year is the result of several years of depression.
   where I shut down and could not function in the world

parties and celebrations - well.. they weren't celebrations at all
        they have been fraught with anxiety and fear of not being enough

Even my relations with my own family
           I come up short
                     repeatedly...
                             and much of the breakdown is a result of my taking charge of my health a few years ago... losing a lot of weight... and not being mentally prepared for all the life changes that entailed.
          But the stress of a group gathering - even my own children and husband - has been overwhelming.

Sometimes finding JOY is a simple matter of recognizing a VICTORY.

This is an explanation.. not a complaint.  I have not had the words for years to explain.

And today I want to talk about VICTORIES
   and JOY

Tonight I negotiated a Christmas party without a breakdown.  Other than a little pre-party anxiety... which is nervous butterflies and should be NORMAL....  I didn't have that horrible rise of fear and emotion that blocks my ability to function.  I actually enjoyed conversation and did not feel out of place.   I did not second guess every word and thought - and I did NOT replay the party in my head for hours and hours afterward wishing I had said or done something different.

And, in the midst of the party, I had made arrangements with my husband to drive and pick up grandgirls for a sleepover.... and I did not spend time worrying about or second-guessing that either....

so....  while it sounds quite small when I put it in words....
       that I had a good time.... and got to play with my girls worry-free

is HUGE! 

It is healing.. and I found joy
   [which is really good.. because I have another event tomorrow night!]

Friday, December 19, 2014

Day 4/365...

What a mixed bag of a day!!

A good day overall... but difficult to maneuver.

The people around me are struggling with emotions....  not hard to understand this time of year.  Me too.  Life is uncertain.

But I want to find the JOY.

Every day.

Hence - my two HUGE joy moments today [besides the beautiful clear blue sky and reasonably chilly temperature!]

My handwork group had a luncheon today - for Christmas... I brought a selection of the jams and pickles I made last summer as gifts.  What a wonderful group of supportive people!  Selfishly.. they make me feel good.  I like to be with them and it was a great couple of hours.  Better yet that I didn't know it was a celebration and I just showed up!  I didn't have time to stress over a holiday function.... only the gift - and I already decided NOT to stress over that :-)  Whatever I canned is good enough!

I hate that I worry so much about not being good enough - BUT no more!  Not this year!

And my other HUGE JOY is my son coming home from college.  He won't be here long - because he has another life that he is living - and I remember how that is :-)  I will just enjoy him while he is here and be happy for him when he goes.

Life is good!

What were your JOY moments today?

Wednesday, December 17, 2014

Day 3.....

The joy of ordinary days.....

Staying at home today, I got to putter around in my own world

Nothing magic to report.... Beautiful weather in the morning... oppressive cold gray rain in the afternoon and evening.  I had an agenda - as usual...

a list to follow [or NOT follow - as is often the case]

I am building a life.... trying to live my days the way I want my life to go

I take walks and enjoy my surroundings....

handle my household chores.... [always a challenge to stay focused!]

got the tree finished :-)

..and try to keep my own emotional self in hand while those in my house swirl in their own turmoil.

My intent is to be sympathetic.. to help where I can...  but NOT to let their mental state drive me to the same location!

Isn't that always the challenge?  To keep your own self above water?

 And I did .  Life is good.

For me, it's the small things.

Getting the sheets changes - is there anything nicer than fresh sheets when you get into bed at night?

A crockpot of food for tomorrow (I will be running around during the day)

a couple of quilt blocks pieced for a class that I am behind in...

just a day of lovely catching up in my own space.

and a new project to dream over..

I took pictures of some of the ornaments as I finished the tree....  these particular ornaments have stories and I will write them.  [of course, at this point, I sort of regret giving all the kids' childhood ornaments back to them as they moved out because I probably should have written the stories first.. BUT... time will tell of the importance or not :-)]  Anyway - I have some to play with - and thinking about it made me smile.

It was a good day for me.....

How was your day?

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Be nice ..

... to yourSELF!!

Holidays are so very very stressful - and many times that stress is totally self-generated!

I hear Christmas carols about family gatherings and joy and peace.

 I see the lovely "Norman Rockwell" prints depicting beautiful snows....  loving groups of people.. and family traditions.

I am surrounded by reminders that I should be happy and jolly and full of excitement.


I FEEL pressure... to buy the right gifts
                             to attend the parties
                             to send enough cards
                              to decorate the most beautifully
                             to schedule in all the appropriate obligatory family gatherings
                AND to be HAPPY doing it....


But where is TRUTH?

TRUTH IS that life doesn't always give you the time to carefully prepare.

TRUTH IS that more often than not, I wake up at Thanksgiving and say WHOA!  How am I going to fit all these expectations in?

TRUTH is that I spend WAY too much time being dissatisfied.... being unhappy.... wishing for MORE at this time of year...

TRUTH IS that most of the expectations are MINE!
              Who really cares if I don't make the no-bake cookies I usually make (TRUTH is that ONE of my children will miss them and the rest of my kids will way "Oh jeez, mom ALWAYS makes those stupid cookies!  Why can't she make anything GOOD?")

              Who really cares if they hear from me between Dec 1 and Dec 31?   (TRUTH is that an annual  greeting can happen ANY time!  TRUTH is that the cards DO get jumbled together.. and a January greeting or Valentine greeting make a bigger memory without an obligation)

            Who cares about the decorations?   Or when they go up or down?   (TRUTH is that it's YOUR house and what is IN IT should bring you JOY.  Period)

           And the appropriate gifts?  What does that mean?  (TRUTH is that if you have a giving spirit - and you give all year long - there is nothing exceptional about being a giving person during a specific calendar time)  

So - may I suggest..... that you protect your spirit - your joyful HOLIDAY spirit - but carefully questioning your TO DO list this season?  Your "OUGHT's".... your "SHOULD'S"....   IS there an unreasonable expectation?    CAN you choose carefully the things you most want to do this year?  The events, dishes, gatherings, traditions... that fill your heart with happiness?

    Can you deal with your "Christmas card" list at a more leisurely pace at another time?  And actually enjoy contacting your friends?

     Can you schedule one-on-one meetings with special friends during the year instead of "having' to get together during the craziest time of the year?  Maybe the 'perfect gift' is a coupon for a February lunch date!

      Can you eliminate half of your decorations?  Just for this year - if you aren't decorated yet....  why not put up the one or two things that make you happy?

Can you reach outside yourself to quietly, anonymously, do for someone else?

What fills your heart with JOY?  Can you create that for yourself this year?

Trust me - creating it for YOURSELF will give it to others around you!
              

Monday, December 15, 2014

Day 2.....

And more magic for Day 2....

I woke up grumpy - you know those days where the tears are right behind your eyes?

I refuse to give my days to that emotion any more.  Not this year - not again.

Mind you, I have no problem recognizing, expressing, and dealing with emotions.  I DO need to FEEL them rather than EAT them or DRINK them or SPEW them out on the people around me... but that is another story.  I am choosing to sit with my discomfort until I sort it out - so.. the tears were behind my eyes for no good reason that I could discern.    Just there.  And I had a choice....

Move forward into the day's plans

or stay home and hide.

The sun is out, I have no obvious crisis... and my life would be complicated if I stayed home.

So I went

LATE

But I did get an hour's work done on my church project.  Me, by myself, working to Christmas carols.  Okay, I skipped church but God was with me so I am good.

AND I got to meet with my daughter and granddaughter who brought me birthday greetings and a HUGE labor of love!  My 4 year old granddaughter had made me several gifts...... wrapped them herself..... and my daughter had patiently allowed all that use of paper and tape... and brought her to meet me!

How magic is that?

Sometimes the tears are just THERE.  All that love, more Vitamin D, a walk in the fresh air when I got home, some affirmations from a coach, all things I did for ME to make me feel better - and I still managed to get on with my life yesterday.

Holidays just hurt.  They are frenetic times of expectations and emotions.  Sometimes just skating through whole is the biggest goal.  There have been a few time in my life when the planets align and a moment is 'just right' during the holidays.  But usually, they are a complete terror for me and I am OH SO GLAD when they are over.

THIS year... I will work every day - to find the magic.  To be good to ME.  To do what I can to keep my peace of mind.  Deadlines for holiday chores.... simplify gifting..... use what I want of the decorations and GET RID OF THE EXCESS....  [I DO have a plan - I simply cannot toss much while I am doing my annual reminiscing.... so I am packing what I am not using separately and marking it to review during the summer!]

AND I keep seeing the MAGIC smiles on my daughter's and granddaughter's faces when I saw them today.

Life is good. 

Saturday, December 13, 2014

Happy New Year, oops!

.. I mean Birthday!

To me! 

So - it IS a new year.... today I turn 59 - I begin my 60th year on the planet.  It seems important somehow...... and I want to totally mark this year.

Will I write more?

Will I lose more weight?

Will I finally get rid of the clutter in my house?

What is certain is that I live

I breathe

and I impact others.

What I WILL do this year is keep plugging along with the projects - but also

work to ensure that my impact is

POSITIVE.

so....  my readers...... if you are out there.....  how can I serve YOU?

Saturday, November 22, 2014

Quilt Stories - Sisters' Choice 2014

This is one of my strangest quilt stories..... and a cautionary tale.  When the universe tells you to do something... do it!

I have one sister.. and we have been estranged for many years.  The reasons are irrelevant now... but there was no sharing

no talking

no sisterhood

for a very long time.

And early that summer, I felt led to make a quilt for my sister.  And I found a block, Sister's Choice.  I decided this was MY choice.  For my sister.

And her favorite color - from my memory - was orange.  I chose the bright zinnia print from my stash.. and bought 2 shades of orange and a yellow to coordinate.

And I did the math to UPsize the blocks....  4 blocks made a generous lap quilt to cover her knees.

My plan was to make it and give it to her on her December birthday.

I had it together and ready for quilting by early November.... and found out, by accident, that she had lost consciousness and was in a hospital several states away.  Her daughter was with her and had been for a week already.

I quickly finished that quilt doing the final handwork in the car as my husband drove me there.



My sister died just before Thanksgiving - having never regained consciousness.  I can't really express how I feel about all this - but I will be glad forever that I followed that little spark that told me to make her a quilt.

I don't have a final photo... I sent it home with my niece.  My hope is that the quilt is a symbol of love across a divide... somehow.

Saturday, November 1, 2014

Quilt Stories - Muppets 2014


This quilt started when my husband's good friend called to tell us his wife was pregnant with their first child.

She was absolutely in love with muppet characters...... and couldn't find any bedding anywhere..... and then I saw this navy muppet fabric in my local JoAnn's.  I had already had great success with crib sheets and burp cloths... and though Elmo isn't technically a muppet... I thought she'd enjoy these items  (the wood grain crib sheet went to my grandson along with his pirate quilt.)



 Making the pirate quilt was so much fun - I rolled with the concept!

  I used some of the same fabrics..... and some other from my stash.... and came up with the quilt below...
 



And I couldn't remember which way the seam was supposed to when piecing the backing  ( somebody told me once - it was either vertical or horizontal)

So I pulled one of my usual funky moves.... and did both :-)  And I like the way it turned out!




I do have to say that it was a pretty cool gift.... and I have had the pleasure of spotting it in my friend's FB posts of their son more than once!  I am good with letting things go when I make them - because I truly get my pleasure from the making - and the good vibes I have for the people I create for.....  but I really do enjoy seeing my creations used and loved :-)



Thursday, October 30, 2014

Quilt Stories - Pirates 2014

My oldest daughter loves putting on events!  Her children have the coolest birthday parties :-)

And this year, her son Orlando had a pirate party..... so I decided to try and design something for him to go along with the theme.  It's not fancy... but it's fun :-)



Thing is... the child himself LOVES ball sports.... so I couldn't help myself... I had some fabric in my stash... and some fabric I had made him a pillowcase with.....



and coordinating fabric from the pirate side.....  and put this on the BACK!

So I felt quite clever... creating my own design... and making it reversible..

and made a curtain to go with both held up by my lovely assistant :-)



Fun!!







Saturday, October 11, 2014

Quilt Stories.... First Attempt.... Around the World 2014

This quilt began in 2007 with little quilting knowledge and a faulty machine

I learned online about Block of the month programs.... and fell in love with the way that the Florida Cabin Fever guild put so many out for me to learn on!

I learned about fat quarters...

This one is made from scraps and specifically purchased fat quarters

Each block matching nothing but the scrap sashing and - to me - representing the country it came from.

Nothing squared, nothing perfect

Just pieced blocks that I put away in 2009 when I took a quilt break..

When I looked at these blocks again in 2014, I immediately saw all the errors and problems.  It hurt my heart because I have 2 more complete tops from the same time period .. and several more started.  And I knew they were awful! 

But I took a second look and decided to honor my own work and learning process.

I straightened things out the best I could - without re-doing anything....

and went for it..

Spray baste sandwiched and quilted by machine.  By me....  (I figured if I learned about piecing on these blocks, I could learn about the rest of the process too!)

It is beautiful.

My first complete quilt top

My third completed quilt.



I do have to say that I am still tickled when I look at it - warts and all.  It is still pretty and it tells a story of a woman who wanted to quilt. 

One who had reasonable sewing skills but zero quilting knowledge. 

One who was brave enough to forge ahead with the knowledge she could gather on her own.

Yep..

I am that woman.  And that is cool.

Mistakes are simply stepping stones....  and your mistakes tell the story of your journey.  Period.




Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Finding Beauty..... Sept 1-3, 2014


I decided to challenge myself to take a photo each day of something that makes me smile... something that takes my breath away... something beautiful in my life.  I am finding much more than ONE worthy shot (maybe because this is new and exciting - time will tell on that one!).  I am posting only ONE to my Facebook page but will share a few more here.  I hope you enjoy them!


This is the choice shot for September 1 - magnificent clouds!  Below is a shot of the spectacular view that went with the clouds..



Sept 2......

I spent most of the day canning and the peppers in this relish really called out to me.  I just love the way they look....



 Below are another two lovelies from my walks...



The colors of the leaf intrigue me - and the back lighting on the crepe myrtle below makes me smile


Sept 3... a busy day that began with my usual walk


I love this particular spot because I can see my halfway point.  Often my friend and her pup are out and we get to say hey...


The curves of this tree captivated me


..especially next to the crepe myrtle...



But my fave for the day by far is this one.... after my grands visit, I spend days discovering little bits and pieces all over my house... and every time I spot one, I smile.  I'm a lucky woman.


Wednesday, August 6, 2014

Wednesday Works in Progress Aug 6, 2014

What a sewing weekend!  I had a couple of extra days and, boy, did I make use of them!

I had a class assignment to work on - plus two granddaughters coming in a few days - plus a new month!  Plenty to get me motivated... and over-extend of course!!

The class assignment is a butterfly border.  Which I did not complete - but I did make the butterflies (the most time consuming part!)


Next I need to square them up, cut plain squares to go between them and actually make the borders for my Traditional English Ladies quilt.

Since it's a new month, I wanted to get a block or two done on the quilts I selected to work on in 2014....

So there is this block from a quilt I started in 2008



I determined to finish it this year doing one or two blocks per month.

And these from one I started in January.  I can't wait to share that one - it's one where I saw the design and envisioned something completely different than the way it was portrayed.

Also doing a few blocks per month...

And then last week, I saw something in a traditional block.  The block is called Old Maid's Puzzle..... and somehow I saw fish.

So I am playing with it!  So far I've made 8 blocks (4 this session).  I had someone ask me how many I needed for my project.. and my answer?  I don't know what the project is yet :-)  I guess we will see when I get tired of creating blocks!

As you've seen before, I was using these Churn Dash blocks as anchor cloth project

so got 4 more finished

But used these 2 border sections (from 2 other projects) as anchor cloth projects instead!

I finished enough sewing to put things away for a few days.. I need to clean up my studio and get ready to enjoy the grand girls.  There won't be much sewing again for another week.

Stay tuned and you will see how all of these projects end up!

I did finish up an afghan - a crochet along project sponsored by String With Style.  I've been working on it for a few months trying to use up some of my stash!


I'm pretty pleased with how it turned out...

What are you creating this week?  Are you working on one project or a bazillion like me?

Monday, August 4, 2014

Monday Summer Reading 7 Aug 4, 2014

I have 3 treasures for you this week - I enjoyed each one!


The Movement of Stars by Amy Brill

Oh my goodness!  The layers in this book!  I started this book thinking it was a history about a woman who studied the stars.  And it is.  I learned a LOT about astronomy.  But the story evolves into an historical (and perhaps current?) treatise on..... women's studies, race relations, religion..... all while charting one woman's personal growth.    A great book that tantalizes the mind!  I would definitely read it again!  And am searching for other books by this author..


100 Things by Dave Bruno -

    The unusual story of a man who decided to live for a year with only 100 personal items.  Sound like a lot?  Look at YOUR stuff!  The book is chock full of his adventures getting rid of his personal possessions (it took a whole YEAR BEFORE the experiment!) and the lessons he learned along the way.

  My biggest take away is the lessons about who I am.  I see myself as a DO-er, not as a collector.  I am a crafter - a crocheter and quilter, which means I have a LOT of yarn and fabric.  This book has given me the words I need to help me with the purchase of new supplies.  I mean - I have already gotten to the point of mostly buying on sale.  And I mostly buy for specific projects. 

But now I have added the thought that I am a QUILTER, not a FABRIC COLLECTOR.  And that helps a lot.  My brain is FULL of projects... I want to MAKE them - not just dream about and purchase FOR them.  So - a new way of thinking will help me grow.


China Dolls by Lisa See

    This is a fun read about three Asian women in San Francisco.... during the World War 2 era.   Their friendship and adventures set in the entertainment industry are fascinating - yet a timeless recounting of the evolution and growth of relationships.  Not a light read - I really enjoyed it!


So - what are YOU reading?  Anything good to share?

Saturday, August 2, 2014

My Jelly Roll Race! Part 1

..I am feeling like doing something a little bit sassy today....

..and since it incorporates using something I bought some time ago - it fits into the overall plan!

 In case you don't know what a jelly roll is.... it is fabric (so I am SEWING in my sassiness!)  It is a roll of 40 precut 44-inch long & 2-1/2-inch wide strips.  I bought 2 rolls almost a year ago when I first heard of a jelly roll race (which coincidentally is when I first heard of a jelly roll!)  Anyway - I found some on sale - neutrals... white to tan... and thought they might be fun to play with.




The jelly roll race is a technique to create a quilt top in an hour (okay - a little longer for me - but I'm not racing)  It started out as a fun activity using one jelly roll and a bunch of people literally racing to put the top together.

In essence.... you take these strips and sew them together end to end in random order.  Then you take the two ends and fold this strip together lengthwise - and sew THAT seam... cutting the ends when you reach the middle (now you have a strip of TWO).  Fold in half again and sew the lengthwise edge  (and now a strip of FOUR strips) and so on....

So - I decided since I have a couple of days at home AND it's the beginning of the month - that I would take the time to play.  I did some cutting and planning on other quilts this morning - so I have things to work on when I watch tv tonight.....  and now it's GO time!  I didn't time myself - but I did note that I started around 11 am

I took one roll, opened it up and laid out the strips.



First decision... how to attach the strips:  flat or mitered (straight or slanted joining seams).  I decided to go with the slant since I have solids in differing grades of creams.  I think it will probably give more of a feel of one color blending into the next.  Also - straight looks a bit more like patchwork - a fave for me... but I think that will work better with different fabrics.

That decision made.... now to make the mitered seams without twisting up the fabric!  This is harder than it seems because my solids do not have an obvious right or wrong side to them ... but I took it slow and didn't mess up too much.  I stopped at this point to trim off the mitered corners and make sure I didn't twist it!  And wondered.... what size quilt will this be?



I am glad I took the time to check!  According to one source..ONE jelly roll makes a lap quilt.. TWO make a bed size - depending on what I choose to do for borders.  So (without reading about actual measurements, mind you!) - two it is.... because I'd rather be safe than sorry... and I stop to hook the second roll together!  (and eat some lunch!)

okay - ready to go again!

I carefully cut 18 inches off one end (to make sure the seams don't run into each other) and matched right sides together for the LONG lengthwise journey from one end to the other.

I found that simply matching right side to right side and the first end of the seam left me with a twist at the en where I need to cut. 


That is a seam along the length of 40 X 44.... or  1760 inches (oh my goodness - by this time, I am into bobbin number 3.. have had to rethread the needle umpteen times and my rear end is NUMB)  It's about 3:15 and I NEED to get up and do something physical!

(Actually my math is OFF - TWO jelly rolls is 80X44!)

****
switched the laundry and took a walk!


As you can see - what to do with the fabric becomes a challenge!

Came back and started again!  The second row of stitching (2rows to 2 rows)  (took a little less time but still a while....  the toughest part here is the twisting at the end.  I imagine if I took the time to smooth things out - it wouldn't happen but I would lose the speed of just matching the ends and GOing :-)

Row 3 has me sewing 4 row sections to 4 row sections.  Another problem I am experiencing is which way to stitch over the miter joins.  I can't figure out how to make them all end up in the same direction except to open them.  Hmm....  looks like I will have to adjust something later.  NOT taking the time to iron is making this a little different than what I am used to.



Row 4 is getting a little heavy and harder to manipulate.



Seam 1 = 1 strip + 1 strip = a 2-strip section (approx 4-in wide)
Seam 2 = 2-strip + 2-strip = a 4-strip section (approx 8-in wide)
Seam 3 = 4-strip + 4-strip = an 8-strip section (approx 16-in wide)
Seam 4 = 8-strip + 8-strip = a 16-strip section (approx (32-in wide
Seam 5 = 16-strip + 16-strip = a 32-strip section (approx 64 in wide)

So I ended up with a 64-inch by 112-inch top - yikes!!  What to do... what to do.....   Another seam (6) would give me 128-inch by 56-inch... not any better!.  I figured that I needed 80-90-inch length and width to work with my queen sized bed.

I decided to remove 20 rows (40 inches) BEFORE doing seam # 6.

I planned to have then a 56 X 88 top - and also 20 112-inch rows to make side borders with!


(screwed up the math again!  After ripping out the 19 rows, I ended up with approx 64 X 54 - I am not sure what I did but I have plenty of joined strips to play with!  The final product will have to be another post!)

The BEST thing I did was choose to alter the size by removing whole rows.  That gave me strips with already mitered joining corners to make borders with.  My plan is to add approx 3 joined strips (6 inches) to each SIDE running top to bottom (opposite direction from the current strips) and then ONE strip (2-inches) all the way around as a unifying outer border.  I should still have enough for binding as well. - I will share all of that in a part 2 post when I get there and have photos!

If I were to do it again (and I probably will) - I would do ONE jelly roll into the top (64X56) and with a second roll I would attach strips together to create a border all around.  Just being careful that the individual strip joinings didn't match up.  Or maybe I will try the same process with 1.5 Jelly rolls and see how that works! (Does that give me an excuse to purchase another jelly roll?)

Thanks to Kimara and Michelle of Wee Folk Art for sharing their experience on the jelly roll quilt!

Making this top was fun!  And definitely quick :-)  It was nice seeing it take shape in a day - and I LOVED seeing how the fabrics are so random in the way they show up in the end product.

Thursday, July 31, 2014

Quilt Stories - Monsters & Dinosaurs for Chase (2 quilts) 2014

With a second grandson following on the heels of the first (one year and 2 days later to be exact!), I wanted to make sure I kept up with the quilting!

This daughter was a long time Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak fan ( which you can purchase here if you like).. and I saw this fabric at JoAnn Fabrics.  I do love getting books for little ones!  Combining a gifted quilt with a book is a particularly fun thing to do!




At any rate.... this quilt is done in a quilt as you go method like Orlando's Monster University quilt..... and I added burp cloths and a crib sheet to match.

Burp cloths courtesy of Amy Smart's tutorial at www.diaryofaquilter.com  at this link - Burp Cloth Tutorial.   Amy is one of the first internet teachers I had - she has an astounding number of great tutorials on her site!.

And crib sheets from www.danamadeit.com at this link - Crib and Toddler Bed Sheets.  This is another easy-peasy thing to make (and people think you are totally talented!)  I need to wander through her site a little more one of these days.

And then a rag quilt - because it was Chase's turn....
with dinosaur fabric and reds and blues...



but I made it so quickly and gave it away so fast that I forgot to get a photo :-(

Wednesday, July 30, 2014

Wednesday Work in Progess July 30

Totally a change up week!

I planned to do my Traditional English Ladies assignment (choosing the fabrics for the next section) and spend the week actually quilting..........



but one of my grandgirls visited so I got on a pillowcase kick...  She and I went to the fabric store and she picked one for herself and helped me pick for her other two cousins...



AND.. I chose some fairy fabric for both little grandgirls who will be having a fairy pajama party with me in a few weeks... and a pirate one for my grandson's pirate birthday party coming up in September.  I'll be working on curtains and some other bedding for that too



and then we decided she needed an afghan for the car when it is cold - and I found some nice fluffy pink in my stash that needed to be used..


..and I FINALLY finished all 4 weeks of a crochet along at String with Style

Using up my stash - I only bought ONE skein of variegated to finish this up.  I have 4 choices in my stash for the final color that will connect them all....  I had one in mind when I started... but am leaning toward another... though all will work!

So - which would you choose?